Skip to main content

Kids Shows Got Dark, Man

(Draft written in 2014-05)

Owl Jr. is now 5, Owlet 7. I of course want to share with them all the nostalgia of my youth, the Transformers, the Star Wars, the whatever line of toys pushed by a transnational corporation thinly veiled as a Saturday morning cartoon.

And it's not just nostalgia. For better, I think , TV made a lot of me. Heroism, sacrifice, friendship, noble acts, greater good. All these nebulous concepts were taught to me through Optimus Prime, She-Ra, Luke Skywalker, GI Joe's "AND NOW YOU KNOW (and knowing's half the battle)" messages, Commander Adama (was there ever an episode where Commander Adama wasn't willing to sacrifice his son for the good of the fleet? Genesis 22:5 amirite fellas!?).

It's also a weird rebellion against the Disney channelization of youth. The  Ascendency of the Upper Middle Class Precocious Youth with All the Wisecracking Answers. Wizards of Waverly Place is all that is wrong with TV programming, basically. I want my kids to grow up thinking themselves heroes in their own drama, aware there are monsters, knowing they are there to beat them. Not being a know it all smug drama kid from orange county with dreams of a narcisstic life of pop stardom.

Simplistic, maybe. But something with a fundamentally better message than Oh My Aren't We Precocious and All Knowing that rings hollow.

But some of the shows reboots are pretty dark. The modern reboots. In Transformers they have made thse kind of slave bad bots. So the Autobots can attack them, rip out their heart, punch their head off, etc. It was a little too metal for their age. I had blindly trusted in the Transformers brand, without really watching several episodes.

Which brings to mind the various mistakes my parents made. Like taking me to Timebandits when i was 5 or so, leading to a few year long phobia of closets, and a horrible story in elementary school about a minotaur. Or to Conan The Barbarian at the same age, which I'm sure has nothin to do with my worship of Crom or fluency with Hypoborean history.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Learn A New Thing...

Man, you really do learn a new thing everyday. There have been a few shocking realizations I've had over the past month or so: -bizaare is spelled bizarre (how bizaare) -scythe is pronounced "sithe", not the phonetic way. Which is the way I've been pronouncing it in my head for my whole life. My entire youth spent reading Advanced Thresher Sci-Fi and Buckwheat Fantasy novels, for naught! -George Eliot was a woman, real name Mary Ann Evans. -Terry Gilliam is American. -Robocop is a Criterion Film. I shit you not . -Uhm, oh damn, just after I post this, I find that, this movie is a Criterion film as well . Maybe I don't know what being a Criterion film really entails.. Alright all (three) readers of my blog, post and lemme know some earth shattering facts you've learned recently.

Cyberpunk 2077

 Like a late 90's webring, replete with link back and hints at an actual relationship with other authors, this is a piece I'd like to say in.. rebuttal is too harsh a term, in reply, to my very long standing internet friend, zompist, where he posts his various gripes with that great sprawling hot mess, Cyberpunk 2077. Now I say hot mess because that's what the internet at large thinks of it, but me, playing on the worringly over-powered computers on GeForce Now, have experienced nearly no problems. Or at least not problems that bother me enough. Keep in mind I'm the Homer Simpson when it comes to critiquing alot of things. I just like, alot of things. Cheap date, as it were.   It might be my hundreds of hours in Bethesda titles and regularly having to look up console commands to debug yet another janked out quest, but it takes a rather large bug to befuddle and begrudge me. Like if a bug repoed my car, maybe, or  told me how much weight I had actually put on during ...

People You Meet on Transit #5

Thanks to Jay Morrison for the photo. Transit Drivers Bus drivers are an archetype in North American culture. In the imagination they are generous in girth, have staunch opinions about unions and eat 300% the recommended intake of red meat. The odd one adheres to a strict conspiracy theory, which they manage to work into the most innocuous conversations. At least, that's what's been ingrained in our collective subconscious along with "Han shot first" and "Dukakis, 1988". But transit drivers, like everyone else, are individuals. Unique, utterly one of a kind from the 5 billion others who roam this spinning mass of molten iron with the cool, carbon life-form infested shell. Sure, you see the reticent ones, who have a 100 yard stare and coolly watch passengers get mild hypothermia while they take their union-sanctioned 15 minute break inside their cozy bus. But there are other, more colourful characters as well. In my city, there is one that calls out every st...