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The Last Thing You Want To Hear...

Fireman
"We'll be right with you sir, but the heat is causing my eczema to flare up!"

Police Officer
"These new taser guns are so neat..."

Surgeon
"Well I'll be damned..."

Stock Broker
"The number you are calling is not in service..."

Psychotherapist
"If you don't mind, my blog commenters just had a few questions..."

Your Significant Other Of Several Years
"You're wonderful, you really are, it's just that..."

Dentist
"You're not one of those quack patients who believes in novacaine, are you?"

Drug Dealer
"If you could just repeat your full name slowly and clearly."

Pawn Shop Owner
"Ah, my best client."

Biology Teacher
"If you'll all open up to Genesis, we'll begin class."

Traditional Chinese Medicine Practitioner
"I got something for that, but first, how do you feel about endangered animals?"

Butler
"Oh, blackmail is such an ugly word."

Pilot
"The weather in sunny Phoenix is 82 and the time is WHOOOOOOOOOO I'M SOOO DRUUNK!"

TSA Agent
"Are you allergic to either latex or petroleum jelly?"
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Comments

Anonymous said…
Well done--but list is tragically short.

Would make a fine twittermeme. #lastthing

monk
5:28 PM
itchylick said…
Ha, good stuff. I think Dennis Leary's version of the pilot is, "Smoke 'em if you got 'em ... We're goin down".
8:12 PM
Niteowl said…
oh damn, #lastthing, that'd get me going for a bit. Smoke em if you got em?! That's rad.
9:09 AM
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