And now to mock a game I've never actually played. (thanks betaray for the topic!)
- breaking your pieces into smaller bits, colouring them your enemies colour, then inserting them in an opponents country to instigate low-intensity counterinsurgency warfare a la America versus every socialist South American country, ever.
- recruiting Cthulu to your cause.
- putting the word 'clockwork' in front of all your units thus granting them +3 to every stat.
- stating Afganistan and Vietnam are impervious to offense.
- mortgaging Park Place to leverage one more hotel onto Madison Ave.
- announce the dissolution of the Soviet Bloc 20 years before it was actually formed and then make a killing on the FIRESALE OF TANKS.
- announcing yourself Emperor of the Republic and spilling black paint over the entire board.
- stringing a "Mission Accomplished" banner between an artillery and cavalry piece.
- using a 1D20.
- while in control of the USSR, throwing away any units who do not win.
- declare you have "Transporter Technology", making any troop buildup unnecessary.
- attacking your enemy's calvary with mange.
- after taking Saudi Arabia, announcing you no longer have to defeat any more countries as you have enough energon to rule twenty earths and a Cybertron as well.
- throwing down your four Aces and saying, "All in."
- yelling "WORTHLESS CHEESEMONGER" every time the player who has France rolls the dice.
- telling Johnny he can't have another Pizza-Pocket unless he agrees to a non-aggression treaty.
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