Other Things That Should Come In "Fun" Sizes

Thanks to betaray for the topic.

caskets
anti-personnel mines
weapons grade anthrax
bibles
Nobel Prizes
tattoos
wills
World Tribunal Trials
embalming fluid
caltrops
foie gras
mashups
hydro electric dams
national tragedies
vultures

Comments

Learn A New Thing...

Man, you really do learn a new thing everyday. There have been a few shocking realizations I've had over the past month or so: -bizaare is spelled bizarre (how bizaare) -scythe is pronounced "sithe", not the phonetic way. Which is the way I've been pronouncing it in my head for my whole life. My entire youth spent reading Advanced Thresher Sci-Fi and Buckwheat Fantasy novels, for naught! -George Eliot was a woman, real name Mary Ann Evans. -Terry Gilliam is American. -Robocop is a Criterion Film. I shit you not . -Uhm, oh damn, just after I post this, I find that, this movie is a Criterion film as well . Maybe I don't know what being a Criterion film really entails.. Alright all (three) readers of my blog, post and lemme know some earth shattering facts you've learned recently.

Insults From A Senile Victorian Gentleman

You SIR, have the hygeine of an overly ripe avocado and the speaking habits of a vaguely deranged chess set. I find your manner to be unctuous and possibly libelous, and whatever standard you set for orthodontal care, it's not one I care for. Your choice in news programs is semi-literate at best and I do believe your favourite news anchor writes erotic literature for university mascots. While I'm not one to point out so obvious a failing, there has been rumour that the brunches you host every other Sunday are made with too much lard and cilantro. If you get my meaning. There is something to be said about your choice of motor-car fuel, but it is not urbane and if I were to repeat it, mothers would cover their children's ears and perhaps not a few longshoremen within earshot would blush. How you maintain that rather obscene crease in your trousers and your socks is beyond me, perhaps its also during this time that you cultivate a skin regime that I'm sure requires the dea...

How To Know If You Are In A Greed Group (aka a Capitalist's Cult)

if your group shares anything in common with a particular Group that has aliens, volcanoes, dc-70s without propellers, and spirits that must be cleared from the soul. you have a section in your seminar that specifies "This is why we are not a cult" if the volunteer to paid employee ratio is greater than 2:1 if recruiting people is the most important goal at the end of your seminar(s) if on googling the group, in addition to your corporation's site, you get hits on cult debunkers, Skeptic's Dictionary and Apologetics Index. if your wikipedia page has a "The neutrality of this article is disputed." warning. if your founder is a disgruntled higher up from aforementioned Group that features aliens, volcanoes, etc. if your group has the nasty habit of drawing many national investigative reporting specials on your cult-like behaviour, and/or governments denounce you as a cult. if you actually pay cult experts to say you are not a cult if while your informing peo...

Periodically.org

Search This Blog