Friday, February 26, 2010

Casting I'd Like To See But Never Will

Greg Kinnear
Plays a grizzled ex-cop turned private detective with an ex-wife who hates him, kids who hate him more. When what he learns threatens to break the thin blue line, he's only got his wits, his underground contacts, and a 1978 Seville packed with weaponry from his days in Vietnam to sort things out.

Wil Wheaton
In a world without hope, in a life without a future, Wil Wheaton is B-Line, a down on his luck freestyle crunk artist who survives by his love of the street, and the rhythms that beat in his soul. Featuring a soundtrack by Jay-Z, TuPac, Ice-T, and Lil John, this is the b-boy movie of this generation. And for all generations.

Tom Cruise
Billy Boynton never had much luck with girls. He never had much luck with work. He never had much luck with anything. In this art-house indie film released straight to the web, Cruise plays a poignant, quiet role as a small man, living in a big world, just trying to carve his own little place of happiness.

John Cusack
Conan the Barbarian, a remake.

Michael Douglas
Toddy Michaels works out a meager living as an Assistant Clerk II at megacorp. Not having relations with models and not being the captain of the industry. This film follows his sorry life until death. At some point he tries to start a hobby chicken farm.


DMK said...

Your Wil Wheaton one is solid gold, Owl -- solid gold.

The Nighthawk said...

Absolutely fanstastic! I also think the Wheaton role is worth turning into a short film. :D

Niteowl said...

DMK : WHERE YA BEEN MAN!? How ya doing?!

NH:YOYO! Yes. a short film! Or music video!

I considered tweeting to Wheaton about this blog post but he has, like a MILLION followers. No point adding to the endless crushing waves of @wil he surely gets.

The Nighthawk said...

I just realized who DMK is! It's like a little reunion!